Be Forever Haromoni@

And so, my first Sunday without Haromoni@ is almost over. I feel strangely empty. Originally, I had planned to do a weekly review of the show with screencaps, but I was never much good at doing screencaps, so I quickly gave up on that idea. Besides, Morningtime did a much better job of that anyway, and while I disagreed occasionally, there was enough of my opinion in his that I didn’t really feel the need to post my opinion myself.

Now though, True Life Seek has posted a typical “nothing of value was lost”-style look back at the show. I say typical not because of TLS’s previous comments on the show, but because of how mostly everyone seems to view the show. Which is fine, everyone is entitled to their opinion, and I don’t have a problem with most people hating it or celebrating its demise. For what it’s worth though, and for anyone who might be interested, here’s my take on it…

Haromoni@ didn’t suck. It wasn’t great, by any means, and it tended to get a bit boring and repetitive, but overall, it was better than no show at all. It gave us a regular weekly dose of the MM girls, and let us glimpse a little of their personalities which would otherwise continue to be hidden behind the veil of concert performances and PVs.

I look at HM@ and I see my Hello!Morning. What I mean is – I haven’t been a fan that long, almost two years now, but I never really felt like H!M was my show. It’s superior in every way to HM@, usually with better segments, and the Theater Skits, the HaroPro News segments, etc, as well as the all-important (to myself and many other English-speaking fans) HaroPro Academy English Lesson episode. The thing is – that show, as much as I love many of the past members, was never about my Morning Musume, the Morning Musume I am currently a fan of.

They often say you never forget your first love, your first episode of your favorite show, or your first album by your favorite band. It may not be the best ever made, but it was your first, and there’s an emotional resonance to be found there that is quite strong. For example, Sexy 8 Beat was my first MM album, and I have a feeling it’s always going to be my favorite. In a similar fashion to those long-term fans who speak of First Gen and the “Golden Era” of Morning Musume with great reverence, I can say that I was there in the beginning for Haromoni@. I’ve seen every episode. I’ve seen the ups and downs, and all with the current lineup. Yeah, Yossy, Miki, and Tsuji may have been there in the beginning, but I love modern MoMusu, and I am proud they had a show to call their own. It may not have been the greatest, but it was theirs. And mine. And it gave us such gems as…

• “Doi Takako desu.” – Insanely catchy, even if I still don’t quite know who Doi Takako is.
• Game Show Host Aichan (with Foot-Head Hat)
• “It’s Art-o!” – Much better without the outtakes, but even those were amusing on occasion.
• Detective Reina – The epitome of grace under pressure.
• Wai Wai the Illusionist – and her biggest fan, Sayumi. It’s too bad those two never did a segment together…
• Banana Princess Junjun – The moment Junjun grew a personality and I became a fan of hers.
• Memory Queen Aika – She laughs at your pitiful attempts to best her!
• Aika’s Picture Foods – Fun for all the kids!
• The Return of Ogawa Makoto – “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m SO sorry!”
• Super Kusumi – I’m a comics fan, I had to mention MM’s “Supergirl”, though it’s a shame she didn’t dress more like the current comics version…
• Dog-eared Linlin – Most adorable thing ever, especially when she would pose the ears.
• Junjun’s LEGS!!! – If you haven’t seen her as a newscaster, YOU NEED TO, NOW.
• The Cabbage Minister – for sheer WTF-ery goodness.
• Junjun gives every last yen of her lottery winnings to charity – That girl is an ANGEL!
• Morning Miisume – The girls play WiiFit and I actually got to download them as virtual friends. In all likelihood, this is the closest I will ever be to them, but it’s worth it.
• The early episodes where they got to just walk around town and go sightseeing. Almost like I’m taking the girls, as well as our brat of a kid (don’t ask me which one the mother is, I can’t choose!), out on a trip to the big city for the day.
• My rediscovered love for Rubik’s Cubes. I need to buy one, I can’t find my old one.
• The girls in a variety of outfits that would keep a uniform fetishist having pleasant dreams every night of the week.
• Cecilia by Simon and Garfunkel – I had never heard it before (I’d only heard the Ace of Base song about the Simon and Garfunkel song), but now I love it, and when and if I ever hear it again, I’ll always think of Morning Musume.

So yeah, lots of goodness to be had, if one is willing to look for it, and to look past the boring repetitive bits. Oh, and as an added bonus because it amused me, I found this in one of the supermarket sales advertisements in my Sunday paper a few weeks ago and I finally got around to scanning it for inclusion here…

I’d buy that for a dollar! Or two! 😉

Btw, what is up with the Linlin baby-eating thing?  I never understood that one, and this isn’t the first time I’ve heard it…

Why Haromoni@ Doesn’t Suck – Episode 062 (06-15-08)

I’ll be the first person to agree with you, HM@ is nowhere near as good as its predecessor, Hello!Morning. But as much as we all miss the Bus Skits, HaroPro News segments, and so forth, I think it’s time we all have to realize that they’re not coming back. Having said that, however, I do not feel that the current show is completely without merit. Yes, it’s in a much shorter timeslot these days, meaning even less screen time for the girls than they’ve been getting so far, but rather than moan about it, I’ve decided to follow Tsunku and the girls’ advice to “BE Positive!” To that end, I’d like to welcome you to the first in (hopefully) a regular picspam (well, clickable links to pics, anyway) series here at J-Pex, Why Haromoni@ Doesn’t Suck.

Today’s episode begins with a performance of Cinderella Complex, the new single by High King. Note the lack of slashes. I don’t like the slashes in the title, so I’m excluding them. Get over it. This song is all kinds of awesome, with some wonderful instances of what I call “electric voice echoes” leading into the chorus. Sadly, I seem unable to remember the non-MM members of the group beyond calling them “Berryz Leader”, “C-ute Leader”, and “That Egg Girl”. They have very good voices, and I’m sure I’m doing them a disservice, but I have crap memory retention skills, so apologies to any of their fans I might inadvertently offend. I can assure you it’s not intentional. What does this have to do with Haromoni@’s non-suckage? The answer, my friends, is Hat Porn. Please understand, I am not particularly a hat person, but ye gods, Aichan can work a hat like it’s a fluid extension of her own body. Poetry in motion. Sheer poetry. And any opportunity for Aichan to share her slick hat tricks with us should never be wasted.

After the performance, we’re taken back to the studio for today’s cosplay. The girls are decked out in Chinese-looking dresses, and I have to say, they are quite stylish. Reina is chosen to do a special pose, and displays a competent cross between sweet and sexy.

Moving on to MouTube, the first video is quite interesting. Until this episode, all of the girls’ MouTube characters have always been separate. Doi Takako doesn’t meet with Detective Reina, for example. I’m a comics fan, however, and I love crossovers, so imagine my surprise when MouTube turns into Marvel Team-Up. Princess Wai Wai teams up with Aichan’s Game Show Host, whose name I don’t know. On reflection, it’s more like Wai Wai is a guest star in Aichan’s book. Aichan even goes so far as to interrupt Wai Wai’s “Y”-stance, as if show the Princess exactly who’s in charge around here. Either way, it’s cool to see two of the girls’ characters together, like they inhabit the same fictional universe. As an added bonus, we almost catch a glimpse of Princess Wai Wai’s secret identity, as she dons her mask at the beginning of the clip. I won’t provide a pic of that, as it’d be too much like peeking into the phone booth to watch C**** K*** change into Superman. As compensation, here’s a pic of Aichan being embarrassed.

Next, we have another “Art-o” clip with Risa. Today’s assignment: Throwing a hat onto Sensei’s head as he leaves the classroom. Fans of WWE wrestling may get a brief giggle out of Risa’s attempts at performing the Degeneration X “crotch chop” manuever (at around 11:35 into the episode) when she becomes too frustrated by her continual failures to accomplish the task given to her. I know I did, at any rate.

As usual, the girls are supposed to guess whether it’ll take a large number of takes to accomplish the task, or a small number of takes. Everyone chooses small, except Reina and Eri, who try to change their answers when they lose. Reina almost manages to pull off a straight face, but can’t quite mask a sly smirk at her naughtiness. Eri’s duplicity, however, is unmasked by the very helpful Risa.

Next, we have something you’d never have seen on Hello!Morning – Reina’s face superimposed over that of a statue of a large man, possibly a wandering swordsman? I dunno. But for extra lulz, Reina also appears on the companion statue of the large man’s pet and talks to herself. H!M probably had the technology to do this back then, but it’s really a more digital fx segment, for a more digital television world, and I just can’t see it being on the old show in any way, shape, or form.

Finally, we come to HM@’s old chestnut, the memory game. Some like it, some hate it, most are just tired of it by this point, but nevertheless, Kusumi is assigned the task of memorizing twenty meat dishes as they are being prepared. Dishes like Meatwaffles, for example. She completes the task satisfactorily, which seems to spark off a brief confrontation between herself and Mitsui Mouse, who, quite honestly, should have been given elephant ears, given her penchant for memorization games.

All that’s left is the preview for next week, with what has the potential to be an interesting segment, Linlin and Junjun, who seem to be doing something Chinese. Not sure what, though.

Overall, a fairly decent episode, even if I don’t understand Japanese. Most of the girls, except Linlin, seemed to have at least a little screen time devoted to them. Better luck next week, Linlin. Sooner or later, they’ll have to give you more to do…